hahaha. Im sure everybody has passed the stage of bloggin. for some reason the idea of blogging everyday didnt appeal to me. but im going to try my best now. and the real reason why i hadnt bothered posting is because I didnt know how to change my password into something I know. haha

and now. since im really going to push  myself in order to really come back to God, Im going use this as a way to keep my thoughts in tact, and for the rest of you to see how i go.

 I had a terrible weekend, I lost my phone! yes i lost my phone and my beloved pig hanging off the phone. oh well.

need to grab all those numbers again. =]

so whoever reads this, pls email me ur number on sylvs.chiuhua.almeida@gmail.com OR on msn.

I had a real quiet time with God today, something i’ve realised i have neglected to do for a while.

I decided to choose a random song in my playlist, and With all I am happened to be playing.

Sitting there, just really talking to God. Just wow, it was just so much more amazing that just sitting and thinking by myself..which is what i’ve been doing recently. I realised how empty it feels to not have God really involved in my life.

Sitting and thinking by myself about my situations. thats how i coped with all these “problems”. Problems of not having a sufficient job which gives me a sufficient amount of hours, problems with certain relationships with people, stress of having to organise a large dance comp, not having enough money at times to do things freely (and plenty of others ), and my struggle to have God put forward in my life. And yet, out of all these many problems..I put MY struggle with my spiritual journey as the last thing in my mind to deal with. not the 1st. I think that really showed me how far I went away.

 As I was listening, I remembered something i heard fairly recently at church or read somewhere in a book. I dont quite remember haha. Embrace your troubles.

 All this time, I wasn’t thanking God for my troubles. I was simply trying to get thru it all by myself. God KNOWS that ive been struggling, and yet I havent been using any of these so called problem as a way to turn to God.

None. I feel so ashamed. This whole time God has been placing all these situations at me in order for me to come back, and all i’ve done is try and deal with them by myself. As I said. I feel extremely ashamed.

 I’ve put too many layers around me, Lord I give you my all. Please remove these layers from me.